While stereotypes (and previous science) claimed bisexual men are just closeted gays, a new study conducted by Northwestern University offers evidence that male bisexuality actually does exist.
Well, there you go, Jay - validation from the scientific community! By the way, just so that you and your readers know, I am a straight girl that very much enjoys reading your blog. You seem like a great guy, and I am enjoying the ride. Thanks for letting me come along with you.
This is really good to read. The (not very well-made) documentary "Bi the Way" talked about the original study and didn't seem to know what to make of it. I'm glad to know I do exist, and I can continue being attracted to both men and women.
FLASH: NEW STUDY PROVES SALT DOESN'T CAUSE HEART DISEASE! oh...wait a minute...i thought salt raised your blood pressure. hmmmm. FLASH: WORLD ENDS DUE TO GLOBAL WARMING! oh, i thought i read the earth was cooling.
get my point? don't look to the scientific community for validation of anything! and don't allow anyone to affix a label to you. labels just put people in boxes. usually someone else's boxes.
there really haven't been any major advances in sexual orientation since kinsey. sexual orientation is a continuum. we're all on that continuum and not necessarily at fixed points. we can move on that continuum depending upon a variety of factors and stiumlants.
jay, you know what you are...what you like. do you really need someone to validate that? i know i'm something of a freak. i had my first sex w/ an adult male when i was in 6th grade. lost my virginity to a girl at 16. i liked both guys and girls and i never once suffered any angst or trauma over it. i knew i had to keep my feelings for men private. i didn't have a loving relationship w/ a man till i was 34. does that mean i'm gay now? fuck if i know or care. please don't misunderstand my point. a LOT of guys have suffered terrible pain and sorrow over an orientation they neither wanted nor asked for. i just wasn't one of them. whatever i am, i don't need anyone or any study to validate me. neither do you jay...neither does mack. you just need to know how to balance the richness that constitutes your sexual identity...and try to do no harm. cheers!
Jay, lol, you are funny! Labels really don't mean anything unless you let them mean something to you, that is true. I do think it's so silly that we care about what everyone thinks about our sex life - even people we don't know. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone could just let it go? Maybe some day. Oh, and some of your readers knew I was a girl, Jay from TGK's blog. But to those of you who didn't, I hope you're all cool with it.
Rugbysex- DAMN! Why weren't you in my human sexuality class in college? Your thoughts would have been "MAJOR revelations" among the so-called liberal-conservatives I went to school with. All I can say is very well spake!
Jay- Interesting... because My Man and his crew have been circulating this report around. He and his friends are former bi guys gone gay. Because of their experiences, they think that there is no such thing as a true bi guy and that you're either gay or straight. On a scale of 1-10, they believe that no one is a 5... and that you either fall closer to the gay spectrum or straight spectrum. But as Rugbysex has remarked, why do we label ourselves? Why can't we just be who we are and want to be??
Anonymous "hottie" - Good morning :) I think it's GREAT that you're reading and also giving your critical thoughts. This statement that you made is soooooo ace!
"I do think it's so silly that we care about what everyone thinks about our sex life - even people we don't know. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone could just let it go? Maybe some day."
I have to admit -- last week, I communicated with this super cool woman (and mom). And I have to say... I was a bit nervous with my reply. Why? Because she was a "she" and as open as I am, I was TERRIBLY self-conscious about the prurient nature of stories I relay on my blog. And that society has taught me that such stories are not appropriate for "girls". How wrong and sexist is that??? That said, yes, I was concerned about what she'd think about my sex life. How silly is that??? Just proof that even uber liberal me is still influenced by "social norms".
Anyway, I've since calmed down -- because she is really cool (and I think my new best friend) :) So, what makes us sensitive to this reality? I'm thinking that maybe that "self aware" aspect of ourselves instinctively kicks in. Thoughts?
T3NL, If we absolutely must label, then I'd agree that no one is a 5. But no one is anything forever. I myself will move from a 3 to a 7 to a 4 to a 9, with no real rhyme or reason. I agree, wholeheartedly, with rugby about labels. Sometimes though, their necessary if only to get our point across. I am who I am, despite what you think about me. But to describe who I am, I need words like bi, gay, etc.
The fact that hottie is a woman hasn't changed what I say in the slightest. Of course, I am much braver through blogs, emails, chats, than I am in person. Thinking about it, I'd probably have a harder time talking about my sex life to a woman face to face than a man. But the reality is that their openness and acceptance is a much bigger factor.
Well, there you go, Jay - validation from the scientific community!
ReplyDeleteBy the way, just so that you and your readers know, I am a straight girl that very much enjoys reading your blog. You seem like a great guy, and I am enjoying the ride. Thanks for letting me come along with you.
hottie
Awesome hottie, glad to have you! How did it feel to come out of the closet? :)
ReplyDeleteThis is really good to read. The (not very well-made) documentary "Bi the Way" talked about the original study and didn't seem to know what to make of it. I'm glad to know I do exist, and I can continue being attracted to both men and women.
ReplyDeleteFLASH: NEW STUDY PROVES SALT DOESN'T CAUSE HEART DISEASE!
ReplyDeleteoh...wait a minute...i thought salt raised your blood pressure. hmmmm.
FLASH: WORLD ENDS DUE TO GLOBAL WARMING!
oh, i thought i read the earth was cooling.
get my point? don't look to the scientific community for validation of anything! and don't allow anyone to affix a label to you. labels just put people in boxes. usually someone else's boxes.
there really haven't been any major advances in sexual orientation since kinsey. sexual orientation is a continuum. we're all on that continuum and not necessarily at fixed points. we can move on that continuum depending upon a variety of factors and stiumlants.
jay, you know what you are...what you like. do you really need someone to validate that? i know i'm something of a freak. i had my first sex w/ an adult male when i was in 6th grade. lost my virginity to a girl at 16. i liked both guys and girls and i never once suffered any angst or trauma over it. i knew i had to keep my feelings for men private. i didn't have a loving relationship w/ a man till i was 34. does that mean i'm gay now? fuck if i know or care.
please don't misunderstand my point. a LOT of guys have suffered terrible pain and sorrow over an orientation they neither wanted nor asked for. i just wasn't one of them. whatever i am, i don't need anyone or any study to validate me. neither do you jay...neither does mack. you just need to know how to balance the richness that constitutes your sexual identity...and try to do no harm.
cheers!
You know that rugby stud makes a lotta sense. hal
ReplyDeletehal, shhhh! Don't encourage him!
ReplyDeleteJay, lol, you are funny! Labels really don't mean anything unless you let them mean something to you, that is true.
ReplyDeleteI do think it's so silly that we care about what everyone thinks about our sex life - even people we don't know. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone could just let it go? Maybe some day.
Oh, and some of your readers knew I was a girl, Jay from TGK's blog. But to those of you who didn't, I hope you're all cool with it.
hottie
hottie?
ReplyDeleteare you followin me darlin? lol.
cheers!
Rugbysex- DAMN! Why weren't you in my human sexuality class in college? Your thoughts would have been "MAJOR revelations" among the so-called liberal-conservatives I went to school with. All I can say is very well spake!
ReplyDeleteJay- Interesting... because My Man and his crew have been circulating this report around. He and his friends are former bi guys gone gay. Because of their experiences, they think that there is no such thing as a true bi guy and that you're either gay or straight. On a scale of 1-10, they believe that no one is a 5... and that you either fall closer to the gay spectrum or straight spectrum. But as Rugbysex has remarked, why do we label ourselves? Why can't we just be who we are and want to be??
Anonymous "hottie" - Good morning :) I think it's GREAT that you're reading and also giving your critical thoughts. This statement that you made is soooooo ace!
"I do think it's so silly that we care about what everyone thinks about our sex life - even people we don't know. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone could just let it go? Maybe some day."
I have to admit -- last week, I communicated with this super cool woman (and mom). And I have to say... I was a bit nervous with my reply. Why? Because she was a "she" and as open as I am, I was TERRIBLY self-conscious about the prurient nature of stories I relay on my blog. And that society has taught me that such stories are not appropriate for "girls". How wrong and sexist is that??? That said, yes, I was concerned about what she'd think about my sex life. How silly is that??? Just proof that even uber liberal me is still influenced by "social norms".
Anyway, I've since calmed down -- because she is really cool (and I think my new best friend) :) So, what makes us sensitive to this reality? I'm thinking that maybe that "self aware" aspect of ourselves instinctively kicks in. Thoughts?
T3NL, If we absolutely must label, then I'd agree that no one is a 5. But no one is anything forever. I myself will move from a 3 to a 7 to a 4 to a 9, with no real rhyme or reason. I agree, wholeheartedly, with rugby about labels. Sometimes though, their necessary if only to get our point across. I am who I am, despite what you think about me. But to describe who I am, I need words like bi, gay, etc.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that hottie is a woman hasn't changed what I say in the slightest. Of course, I am much braver through blogs, emails, chats, than I am in person. Thinking about it, I'd probably have a harder time talking about my sex life to a woman face to face than a man. But the reality is that their openness and acceptance is a much bigger factor.